Shall We Date?: Can't Say No, Subaru Tadokoro Normal Ending Review

Seriously you guys, never before has the ending to a game made me feel the need to go to church and confess all my sins as strongly as this one did.

Of course, I did not go to church because if I stepped foot anywhere near it I'm sure the whole thing would burst into flames, but that is neither here nor there. Are you ready for the most ridiculously insane, smutty, despicable, and obscene otome ending ever?

Then join me on this trip into HOLY SHIT DID THAT REALLY JUST HAPPEN town, where Mayor WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK JUST HAPPENED IN FRONT OF MINE VERY OWN EYEBALLS resides.

**SPOILERS AHEAD**

Shall We Date?: Can't Say No, Subaru Tadokoro Sweet Ending Review

Subaru's Sweet Ending. I don't even know where to start with this.

I just.....don't know.

**SPOILERS AHEAD**

Shall We Date?: Can't Say No, Subaru Tadokoro Happy Ending Review

So here are my ramblings for Subaru's Happy Ending. I just....don't even know....like it started out so well and then it all just went completely off the rails. I feel like I need a week long break after playing this route.

**SPOILERS AHEAD**

Shall We Date?: Can't Say No, Subaru Tadokoro Main Route Review

My hell you guys, are you ready for this? Because I don't know that I am.

 

Seriously, I hope you are prepared to take a one way trip on the crazy train to lunatic town where nothing makes sense and everything you ever thought you knew about life is wrong and seemingly innocent otome games are anything but. Oh, and guess what?! You'll think you're going to convince yourself that the various endings to this game totally weird you out, and you're going to put your phone down in shock and disgust only to realize moments later that you actually really liked all the endings. All of them. And you're going to pick your phone back up hesitantly at first, but then you're going to play the hell out of the game again and again and then probably again with a fervor the likes of which haven't been seen since that night 6 years ago when you played Guitar Hero for the first time completely hammered with a bunch of your friends at your apartment. You all thought you were Jimi Hendrix reincarnated and took turns shredding on that damn plastic guitar until 7 am before someone inevitably passed out in their own vomit and tears. Everyone then made a pact never to drink again mere hours before you all got drunk off jagerbombs and vodka mixed with Mountain Dew.

 

You'll realize after playing Subaru's route that nothing makes a lick of sense anymore so you might as well come to terms with your fucked up moral compass and weird fetishes now because this is your life from here on out; a mess of empty Pocky boxes and energy drinks strewn around you while you play an otome game that has dragged you straight down the rabbit hole into WHAT THE FUCKVILLE, where you actually want to buy a house and live forever.

 

 

**SPOILERS AND STRAIGHT LUNACY AHEAD, ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK**

Shall We Date?: Can't Say No, Subaru Tadokoro Sweet, Happy, and Normal Ending Walkthroughs

Holy shit you guys, I can't even with this.

Words escape me right now. I just finished all three endings for Subaru, and hopefully when I get around to writing the reviews I will have something to say other than HOLY. SHIT.

So the Happy and Sweet Endings are basically the same choices until Chapter Ten.

Chapter One
* Thank him and accept the gift.
Chapter Two
* Tease him by offering the chair next to you.
Chapter Three
* Stay silent and nod at him.
Chapter Four
* Give the cake to him with a smile.
Chapter Five
* Tell him firmly you don't have a choice.
Chapter Six
* T-thank you so much!
Chapter Seven
* Then I want you to cheer me up some more.
Chapter Eight
* Look down apologetically.
Chapter Nine
* Why didn't you say anything?

Sweet Ending;
Chapter Ten
* I want to be with you.

Happy Ending;
Chapter Ten
* Say you'll do anything and take off your clothes.

Normal Ending;
Chapter One
* I wish you'd bought them just for me.
Chapter Two
* Tease him by offering the chair next to you.
Chapter Three
* Stay silent and nod at him.
Chapter Four
* Teasingly hold it out to him in one hand.
Chapter Five
* Shrug him off saying it's not his business.
Chapter Six
* I really wanted to see you!
Chapter Seven
* Hug onto him saying you're happy to hear that.
Chapter Eight
* But that's impossible!
Chapter Nine
* Bring his hand to your chest.
Chapter Ten
* Say you'll do anything and take off your clothes.